(Disclaimer alert: ranting to follow, as well as highly inappropriate metaphors and exceedingly little in the way of actual summary of Secret Wars.)Įvery morning on my way to work, I pass the Washington Monument, thrust up into the air like the proudly tumescent stone member of a long-deceased white guy, and I think to myself, “Self, I sure need some coffee.” Meanwhile, Reed has to overcome personal tragedy and try to fight a god for control of a world he doesn't recognize in the hopes of making things right again.Ĭan magic and science work together to save the universe? Victor is actually trying to do the right thing, but because he is who he is, the cracks in his character start to show, and shit starts unraveling. Well, without spoiling much, I can say that this is a Doom vs Richards story. I am hoping this will be the last BIG EVENT for a while, but I'm sure there were worse ways for a reboot to happen. I actually kinda thought this was an interesting story with pretty pictures. Now, it may sound like I'm saying this was horrible or unreadable, but I'm not.

I would have assumed I was still missing out on some important piece of information, and then it would have driven me nuts till I finally just broke down and read the damn thing. Part of me is wondering why I bothered to read this because I probably would have gotten as much out of it if I'd used Wikipedia.Īnd then part of me is really glad I did read it, because there's no way I would have believed a Wikipedia article that described what I just read.

Which sounds kinda cool while you're reading it, but later you're like.

Lots of bizarre stuff that would go well with a pot brownie and some beer, you know?Īnd the characters are always saying things like, Time faces the light to stave off the darkness, or some shit. Or, at least, what I'm coming to associate with his storytelling. This was very much a classic Hickman story. I mean, what am I going to do about it anyway? Start wandering through parks, shaking my fist and yelling, What the fuck did that stretchy bastard do at the end?! Long-term ramifications, motherfucker! What. I get the feeling that the ending being somewhat vague (and fucking abrupt!) was done on purpose, so the Powers That Be can tweak things as they need to, and.ok. I mean, I know what happened, but I don't know what happened.

Secret wars by jonathan hickman